The Routine vs. The Variable

If given the opportunity, I would live like a 19 year old boy.  I wouldn’t clean.  I would sleep till whenever.  Nap whenever.  Shower whenever.  I’d eat breakfast for dinner and dinner for breakfast.  I’d watch primetime TV in the morning.  I’d workout at night.  I would love to move to Alaska in the summer (or is it winter?) when it’s light out all day.  And I don't think reptiles can live in such a cold environment, right?  So that's a plus.  Although I don't know I was never that into science.

Anyway- having a routine isn’t one of my natural capabilities.  Therefore, I find myself heavily attracted to anyone with a routine or a structure.  Not so much envying their dreams but just their lifestyle.  Constantly adapting to changing forces gets seriously exhausting after a couple of years.  So yes, I am obsessed with anyone with a consistent and planned out lifestyle.  Obsessed, envious, jealous, mesmerized, intrigued, a couple of other synonyms for obsessed, etc. 

My goals and dreams don’t offer much structure.  But I wanted structure, badly.  So I started chasing other dreams.  One that included set hours, set days off, set times to eat lunch or drink coffee, etc, etc.  And then I was offered two very different directions.  One that let me use my intellect and one that let me use my passion.  The most appealing about the first direction was the coffee machine and the routine.  Really?  A coffee machine is going to define my entire life?

And the next opportunity was great it just didn’t have much of a structure.  Can I live my entire life like that?  It’s not for everyone.  But sitting in an office, drinking coffee all day, counting down the hours until freedom just isn’t for me.

Just because I have the intellect doesn’t mean I have to prove it to anyone else.  Just because I didn’t have to work that hard to be good at something I’m passionate about doesn’t mean I have to put it down.  Why live a stifling life just for the routine and have to tone down my entire being 5 days a week? 

Every year I get just a little better at life and I don’t want to choose a path that lets me stop dreaming.  Even when you think you’re not settling, you might still be settling.  So keep dreaming.