In theory I would love, a nice guy, who opens doors, buys me flowers, gives me compliments, is a gentlemen, etc, etc. However throughout my entire history with boys, when the nice guy appears, it's not that I don't like him or think he's just too nice or more like a friend or just not for , the truth is more than anything, I feel thoroughly creeped out. The experience of holding hands in public makes me nauseous. Omg what if I have to be stuck and uncomfortable with him forever? Ah please don't buy my drink or by me dinner or walk me home. I feel suffocated after the first 30 minutes of meeting you, and all you're doing is being nice and showing interest. Are those flowers and would it be horrible if I burned them?
On the flip side, there's the unattainable person, who its baffling why you still interact with someone so thoughtless, yet the fact that you knowingly know that they really detest your company, okay maybe not as strong of an emotion as detest, just makes the time spent together so much more enjoyable. I don't get why. The guy doesn't get why. Friends don't get why. But its just the way it is. The doors, the flowers, the compliments, and the gentlemen will never come but if they did, I don't think I'd be grossed out by any of it (unlike my thoughts of the above).
And then there's the man, that you actually like, are actually attracted to, but then end up being so intimidated the entire time, that you end up being some weird warped version of yourself. Like did I seriously just say that? Who am I? What's my name? I don't even know.
6 times out of 10, I'm creeped out. Even if you're cute, you're funny, you're nice, ugh it's just too much too fast. 3 times out of ten, I'm a shy/awkward attempt at being an outgoing person. 1 time out of ten, I meet the unattainable.
I guess I never really realized that the guy may actually be nervous talking to you. And that no he can not actually read my mind. I think I'm being friendly, and he thinks I like him. I think he's being friendly and then suddenly hands are attempted to be held and I'm in shock as to where that came from.
I would love a nice guy, who wouldn't? But 9/10 when they appear, it's just suffocating and uncomfortable. Then when you meet the unattainable- people tell you that you're just too nice and need to drop him. How nice can I be in comparison with the rest of society? I mean gosh I'm no Saint....um who was that...oh Mother Teresa, is she a Saint? Can people still become Saints? Is the Pope a Saint? Okay completely off-topic.
All nice girls want is an in between of a jerk and a nice guy.....what I would define, as..... I don't know a normal human being. Is that so hard? Apparently, because I'm either left nauseated and suffocated, or sad and hurt, or I somehow transform into a mute who attempts to not be mute, hah I guess that could qualify as a mime. I'm sure picking up miming would attract some special.
Sometimes I think all my future has in store, is a full-time job at Wal-Mart, wearing that blue apron, married to someone without a full-set of teeth. I don't even shop at Wal-Mart. And I can't even look at crooked teeth, let alone missing teeth. I think my ticket to success is to pick up miming. It offers both employment and attention, and I think I'd be able to k.eep all of my teeth.
Fabulous tip of the day: Do absolutely none of the above, you'll be able to eliminate confusion, and you should be in a much better position than me.
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